This is the origin of the expression 'Shaggy Dog Story'.

Try and remeber that the most important part of a joke is the funny bit - try not to leave it out.

How many Trads does it take to change a light bulb?

Er, then something about 50 or so to argue about what tie to wear, or something.... erm. Yeah, can't be bothered really, but you get the gist.

"Have you got a herringbone sack?"

"No, it's just the way I cross my legs."

Ha

^
Also why he always felt overworked.

Knock knock...

"Who's there?"

"Ivy"

"Ivy who?"

"Ivy-lieve I left my Keydge jacket wadded up in the drawer of your bedside table."

On the subject of Ivy League style, what did one current Brooks Bros. employee say to the other?

Absolutely nothing.

A very old man wakes one morning and finds the back door of his house ajar.  Only slightly concerned, he begins looking around his house to make sure none of his belongings are missing.  Finding nothing amiss, he continues his morning ritual of coffee, bacon, and eggs and then a few hours of old Perry Mason reruns.  Then after mowing the lawn he takes a shower and freshens up.  Upon opening his closet he hears a whimpering sound.  He parts his collection of ancient 3/2 sacks and vintage Brooks Makers shirts to find a young man entwined with a mohair sweater in the fetal position on the floor of the closet.  He appears to actually be licking the sweater and caressing it, as if making love to it. 

"What on Earth is going on here son?  What are you doing in my closet?"

The young intruder looks up with frenzied eyes and begins to mutter, "I.... I....  just please leave me be.  Please, I beg of you."

"Who the hell are you, you sicko?" asks the old man. 

"I.... I....  they call me Worried Man."

lol.

What's the first thing that goes through an Ivyist's mind when he gets hit by a speeding car?


His penny loafers.

Haha. 

We asked the victim what the driver looked like and he just kept saying something about the roll.  Yes, we know he rolled over you, but what did he look like?