You are not logged in.
#1 2009-09-15 12:47:44
- devin
- Member
- Posts: 24
Shirts and Softness
Acknowledging that a nice, soft shirt has a pleasant appeal and that I do not subscribe to some conflicted, UHB notion of authenticity, does anyone have advice for softening up the worst of the worst?
Tongue slightly more out of cheek, I have one of those Brooks non-irons of infamy (very stiff due to whatever coating they use). I had given up all hope of it ever yielding into the autumn of its life, but just yesterday I handled one that was, actually, soft (all things being relative). This unicorn of a non-iron was very near to the end of its life (a few small holes, much fraying). So, the desired characteristic is achievable, assuming a person can age the shirt more evenly.
I would think that I can't exactly stonewash a shirt (nor would I put stones in my wash), but my shirt will most certainly not go soft all by its lonesome (I work at a desk). I have washed it many times, from wear, and it has in fact begun to fray. But the cuffs and collar remain faithful to their rigid reputation. Is there a J. Crew-esque "secret wash" I may practice at home, under the full moon?
All advice taken and considered. You needn't even speak to my question itself. Soft shirts, I assume, are widely appreciated and sought after in general.
#2 2009-09-15 14:16:23
- Natural Sole Brother
- Ivy, naturally.
- Posts: 782
Re: Shirts and Softness
Put a large raw white onion in a sock in your washer with the shirt. Sounds crazy but it does work. Enzymes produced by the onion in combination with a non-chlorine detergent will eventually break through the coating of the shirt fibres.
Fifteen to twenty treatments of this kind should render your formerly 'non-iron' shirt as soft as butter.
#3 2009-09-16 00:05:48
- Taylor McIntyre
- Son of Ivy...
- Posts: 342
Re: Shirts and Softness
I was going to mention some kind of enzyme wash but had no idea about how to effect one.
Maybe soaking the shirt in the manner you suggest for a good long while & then washing it in the normal way would be a neater process... But would it still work?
#4 2009-09-16 01:57:16
- Beatnik
- Member
- Posts: 604
Re: Shirts and Softness
Has it come to this? Surely the dullest of all threads. Like the back pages of 'Womans' Weekly'...
#5 2009-09-16 02:11:37
- Moose Maclennan
- Ivy Inspiration
- From: Hernando's Hideaway
- Posts: 4577
Re: Shirts and Softness
I prefer my oxfords and poplins a little, erm, stiffer. For some reason they wear a little cooler and less saggy that way.
#6 2009-09-16 02:14:32
- Beatnik
- Member
- Posts: 604
Re: Shirts and Softness
Moosey don't give in to this horrible thread. You're better than this...
#8 2009-09-16 03:34:01
- Moose Maclennan
- Ivy Inspiration
- From: Hernando's Hideaway
- Posts: 4577
Re: Shirts and Softness
The soft shirt brigade might want to look out for the Lands' End 'sueded poplin' (?) shirts. Unlined collar and cuffs too.
#9 2009-09-16 04:18:42
- Beatnik
- Member
- Posts: 604
Re: Shirts and Softness
Because Moosey. I've been away for a few days and not been on the forum. When I opened up all the threads I missed I just thought it was all a bit boring really. The people aren't boring. The crew are intelligent and articulate and witty, like yourself, but every now and again things just slide into dullsville. And a thread about boiling a fucking onion with your shirt just summed these doldrums up!
I'd rather have a good, entertaining barney than dissapper into total banality... What say you chum?
#13 2009-09-16 04:36:55
- Beatnik
- Member
- Posts: 604
Re: Shirts and Softness
Just like Ol' Luke... I'm a just natural born world shaker!
PS. I love you Uncle...
#15 2009-09-16 04:43:19
- Taylor McIntyre
- Son of Ivy...
- Posts: 342
Re: Shirts and Softness
It's playing with that 'dullness' to make it 'hip' that's the razor's edge...
Big B. - Cancel your plans, we have to go camping together next summer.
#17 2009-09-16 04:54:32
- Natural Sole Brother
- Ivy, naturally.
- Posts: 782
Re: Shirts and Softness
Beatnik, you seem to had an irony bypass in your time away from the forum.
Who in their right mind would consider boiling a fucking onion in a sock to make a shirt softer? My hope was that at some time in the future this technique would be taken as an orthodoxy as a result of some desperate googling:
"shit must be true; I saw it on the internet."
We all want to kiss the sky.
Some of us are willing to try.
#19 2009-09-16 05:02:15
- Beatnik
- Member
- Posts: 604
Re: Shirts and Softness
NSB. Sorry mate, if that's your idea of irony. Perhaps you are suffering from a little irony defficiency yourself? I like my irony to be thought provoking, sympathetic, witty...
#20 2009-09-16 05:07:44
- Beatnik
- Member
- Posts: 604
Re: Shirts and Softness
I admire your honesty Moosey. "Dull is what you want now". But I don't really think that's what you truly feel. If someone described you as dull you would be offended.
Glamour isn't just for girls and you know it. You are being a touch glib there chum.
You go to the Jazz Cafe you don't want dull. You want fabulous well dressed people that get your creative juices flowing...
#25 2009-09-16 05:27:25
- Natural Sole Brother
- Ivy, naturally.
- Posts: 782
Re: Shirts and Softness
Go and wank yourself off into the armpit of your cheesecloth shirt.