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#1 2022-07-17 04:04:07
- Tworussellstreet
- Member
- Posts: 599
Ivy Incident
Reports are coming in of an incident in the Derbyshire region. A 60-something man dressed in an M65 army jacket, chino trousers and suede boots, was seen driving his Saab motor vehicle aggressively towards a pedestrian of similar age dressed in an M65 army jacket, chino trousers and suede boots. Police report that on impact the pedestrian could he heard shouting out seemingly random words such as "woof" "dressed well" "Talk Ivy rules" amongst a range of expletives. The gleaming Saab was then witnessed swerving off and heading at breakneck speed towards the M1 motorway. The condition of the man hit by the Saab is serious but not life-threatening. His badly injured right arm is in a sling, inhibiting his ability to use the internet. In the meantime Police advise all members of the Talk Ivy community to proceed with caution and remain alert for over-polished Saabs in their area.
#2 2022-07-17 06:40:13
- RobbieB
- Member
- Posts: 2219
Re: Ivy Incident
I read that the 'accident' took place outside a charity shop and the 'victim' was carrying copious amounts of winter clothing and a number of obscure jazz records. A witness said that the driver of the Saab shouted out something about 'underpants' and 'my name is Barking now and don't you forget it'
'I am a closet optimist' Leonard Cohen.
#6 2022-07-18 10:04:45
- Staxfan
- Member
- Posts: 780
Re: Ivy Incident
No postings from AFS for a couple of days now so maybe there's some truth to this.......
#7 2022-07-19 09:11:32
- Streetlight
- Member
- Posts: 51
Re: Ivy Incident
Maybe AFS has gone over to the other side, a prisoner exchange maybe?
#8 2022-07-19 09:51:42
- Tworussellstreet
- Member
- Posts: 599
Re: Ivy Incident
A Talk Ivy contingent are on their way to Derbyshire to establish the precise circumstances of AFS's disappearance. Ivy G-Men, in Clubmaster glasses, crew cuts, tab collars and herringbone jackets will be posted around the hospital building in the style of Michael Corleone in The Godfather to protect this forum's finest asset. At this stage fears have naturally developed that we are too late and that members of Woof's Suburban Saab posse may have already nobbled the great man. We can only pray for his immediate and typically spiky return, for without him we will surely return to the previous levels of comatose inactivity.
#9 2022-07-19 14:44:33
- Runninggeez
- Member
- Posts: 688
Re: Ivy Incident
Cyber War by DW, they may have corrupted poor old AFS's PC with some dodgy virus.
#10 2022-07-20 04:43:10
- RobbieB
- Member
- Posts: 2219
Re: Ivy Incident
I wonder if someone has used their power as forum administrator to ban our 'finest asset'? It's unusual for AFS to disappear without a by your leave.
Anyways, I hope he returns soon to keep this forum running.
'I am a closet optimist' Leonard Cohen.
#11 2022-07-20 04:45:41
- RobbieB
- Member
- Posts: 2219
Re: Ivy Incident
He could be ill of course. In which case I wish him a speedy recovery.
'I am a closet optimist' Leonard Cohen.