I got a Casio Duro For £50 quid. Looks fine. Not too much writing on the dial. Green bezel like Rolex Starbucks submariner or the other one whose name escapes me. Bill Gates has the basic black version.

''Remember when people just looked in the shop window before buying a watch? It was your one and only watch not part of a collection. If it was an automatic you did not need an electric winder to keep it ticking over. Those things probably did not exist.

You did not know the dimensions case size lug width etc....''

It's all for pseuds now and because of the internet there's a lot more gentleman amateurs about.

The whole measuring with calibrated calipers in reviews is embarrassing. You know damn well the measurements are already exactly as stated.

Apparently, it was Archie Luxury's contribution to the watch review world to popularize giving a shout out to which watch you are wearing just before the watch review. Preferably a completely unrelated and more expensive watch to the one you are about to review.

But I remember back in the 80s, the National Geographic was big on Rolex Pepsi GMT advertising with ex-NASA astronauts and The Sunday Times magazine was big on Omega Speedmasters.

My father sold watches for over 40 years and was frequently asked by relatives which watch they should buy.

He was consistent in his reply - the one you like that keeps the right time.

He reckoned that a watch powered by a quartz movement was far more reliable than an automatic and there was little difference between a quartz movement in a cheap watch and a recognised brand.

Watches are very personal possessions and rate, with a wedding band, as one of the few items of jewellery that men should wear. If money is no object I would always wear a classic time piece such as a Cartier tank or Rolex sports model. The last thing you want is to invest in something that dates.

Whilst the price of the Tudor Black Bay Pro makes great sense, there was a waiting list locally, but not if I travelled further out.

Got 500 off the new Omega Speedy with the 3861 movement with hesalite/plexi glass. The bracelet that tapers to the clasp is spot on along with the new dial with exact second marking for the chrono hand. It looks the biz and is probably the best generation of the Speedy Pro to date.

That's the most I've ever spent on a watch. And my credit card and debit card was denied as a suspicious payment. So I ended up doing 4 immediate bank transfers. The Speedy remains an iconic piece without any negative flash overtones. But I felt a pang of guilt somehow.

But so much has changed in the last 3 years, I've arrived at a completely different psychic topography and I feel like if I'm lucky I've 30+ years left of time allotted. Maybe only 20. And there's no time to waste.

So near things are not what I'm looking for. It has to be 100% spot on, from shoes, to watches to whiskies and wine.

We're told to want and expect lesser things, especially for our kids, I say hell to that!

''But one of my mates, who is sadly no longer with us, started buying watches and amassed 5 or 6 Rolexes...''

That makes sense to me, surround yourself with handsome things before you make the final jump into hyper-space.

So much shit has gone down these last few months, it all falls into the You Couldn't Make It Up territory e.g. DNA test that went on to reveal my father had an additional family on the continent that he was supporting across two marriages whilst having additional kids with this lady!  In life, I've noticed when the whiff of the weird goes down, it's a trend, not just one instance of strange occurrences, it's several.

Was in the Seiko boutique today, some seriously good stuff in there. Grand Seiko's, enamel faced spectaculars, the new Arnie in full metal, etc, etc. Had a good chat in there, they've created a vibe, there were people coming in for a mooch around and having a chat too. Where I got the Speedy is similar as well, these are young guys who dig watches. Totally different ambience to the high-end luxury watch, Rolex authorized dealers. 

A colleague of mine bailed out his wife's family during the lockdowns. Suddenly, he started to sport high end watches. Then he told us, in amongst all the other bailouts, he had given a loan to his wife's sister and she couldn't pay it back. So she gave him her ex-husband's watch collection she'd kept in the divorce and there they all where dozens of Rolexes and luxury watches in socks and he sold most consignment and got more than what the loan was.

''I don't know much about watches but if I had enough disposable income I would buy a Breitling with a blue dial. I usually buy Timex Harborside or Expedition watches at £60 a pop and I wear them 24/7 until they break.''

There's a few good Breitling's out at the moment, including blue, copper and pistachio dialed ones. Grand Seiko have some handsome blue dialed ones too. All very tempting.

Thinking of reducing my collection now to the Speedy, the Seiko Marinemaster and another more iconic one, maybe the Explorer I, or even the new 007 Omega Seamaster on the NATO strap, the rest can go. Then again, there's other good stuff out there. I'll need to sell and save up, so no rush.

The Speedy Pro is great, it's iconic without any bling.

Of acrylic glass watches you've got the dressy Longines Conquest and also the CWC G10 Mellor which does look good too.

A few years back it seemed to me that watches were falling out of favour with younger people ,who checked the time using their phones but I have noticed that the same people now tend to use a smart watch on their wrist. I view the smart watch as a possible scam. Mind you  I have had a few wrist heart rate GPS watches for running logs.

''It's a business run on artificial scarcity and people line up to be put on waiting lists while the companies line their pockets with ever increasing prices. Sorry mate, you've fallen for a scam.''

Yes and no. Certainly, the Rolex business model and their latest trick warrants some scrutiny by the discerning watch buyer and afficionado...but the Explorer I still cuts the mustard. I wouldn't touch anything else that will get you spotted as a target, or in with those middle management clowns who take great delight in flashing their Rolex by wearing their shirt cuffs behind said watch.

I agree, the waiting list malarkey is a scam for the gullible. Whilst a Rolex watch is well made, mass produced and an example of the veblan effect, more so than a luxury/high performance car, it is more than this. It's a hard asset you can immediately liquidate for currency anywhere in the world. There's value in that, for certain types.

Agree on the Explorer, it's a watch I can get behind unlike all these newer Submariners, GMTs, Yacht-Masters that are just outright vulgar and scream status symbol. One thing that I find most funny about Rolex is how they are a universal status symbol for most people yet hardly anyone can tell you're wearing one or identify the model, least of all if it's a real one.

Can you actually do all this with a smartwatch? I thought they were bascially just for notifications, skipping music and counting your steps.

I presume you're talking about Airods? I have never used headphones as I don't like the feel of them.

Got the latest incarnation of the Cartier Tank Quartz in the Large size. Little difference from the Solo, but they've marketed it as if it's been off the unavailable for years. Was going to check out the Solarbeat, but they only had in small and when told that I'd heard it had been taken off the market, they admitted there has been problems with the technology.

It is that classic Tank, unmistakeable and iconic in that unisex size.

It's pretty good experience getting from Cartier as well. You say you want to see the Tank's and they take you to the display which is all the diamond and gold models, so you have to ask for the more cost-effective versions. The service is really good.

Went to the Breitling dealer before and that was full-on hard sell. But their range is pretty good at the moment with the exception that the Aerospace appears discontinued.

As cost of iconic watches go, the Tank is still relatively affordable.